Of Black holes and others

TRINNNNG....TRIIINNG.... the alarm clock went on as I put it on snooze for the third time, only to realize later that it was 9:00 AM and I had to make it to the class by 9:10. Hence, began my daily routine; searching for toothbrush I removed, replaced and reinstalled every single object in my room, which basically resembled a sweep-stock.

With ‘Mission Impossible’ in mind and reminding myself of the Adidas tagline “Impossible is nothing”, I decided to give it a go, “attend the first period.”  I ran towards the toilets. Now, our toilets are something even Da Vinci would have failed to design. I fail to gather superlatives to describe its cleanliness, which for sure is not next to Godliness. Even God would have exclaimed,” OMG! ”, looking at the mess He created by creating man, had He seen our toilets. According to me though, these toilets have been designed to make us all work hard to get placed in areas having cleaner facilities and to make us all realize that life is not as easy as it seems.... : P

Inserting butt into my trousers and belt in the buckle, stuffing myself with a piece of bread I ran towards my bike, only to find it ‘dry’. Thanks to Manmonah – Sarkar, now petrol theft is a daily occurence. Searching for lift, I found a bike with ‘only 2’ on it, pushing one on the fuel-tank, began my journey to the college.

There’s this amazing view in my college every time I go there, although it in itself is a rarity. There is always an equal number of people coming out as that entering it; thanks mainly to the phenomenon of GT (group ‘tadi’) or mass bunk. However, I have my thumb rule, “Follow the crowd.” That is ‘actually’ why I have around 25% attendance. The crowd always seems to be moving out and hence do I, sometimes with other branches. :(

At classroom – Losing my conscious, in danger of losing myself, I kept on listening, as the ‘Power generation’ lecture went on. When you are in a classroom, there’s this surreal world that hovers above, that the mere act of ‘understanding’ seems more like hallucination. However, classroom is a place that enriches your imagination; you begin to think of Einstein and Stephen Hawking and the 4^th dimension and how the “time” stopped after you entered the class; you begin to think of relativity and its consequences, the vision of an indefinite period. You begin to think of the ‘Butterfly effect‘ and that small act of nuisance that brought you here, you begin to think of ‘inception’ of some sense in what all the Professor professes and just when you are singing, “Wake me up, when the lecture ends”, the professor strikes, “Hey you! The one with specs....Look here. Now tell me, how is biasing done in a transistor? “ “Sir, all the transistors and amplifiers are made of the same material, i.e. silicon; hence they must not be biased on basis of caste, creed or colour....” was my innocent reply and I still fail to gather why was I sent out of the class.

By the way, this generous act of kicking my butt helped me reach the mess before others and to avoid lines for chapattis. For those who haven’t had mess food yet, let me tell you, it ‘actually’ is, the most delicious stuff you can have on earth. You can try and leave it for a day or two, throw it secretly or go slam-bang at the cook but you’ll have to ‘have’ it at the end of the day. Contrary to common belief, I don’t feel that our cook is a shithead; to make something that is hated by 600 people alike is an achievement in itself.

Cometh the day, cometh the meal. Every Saturday morning there’s a feast on offer and when your olfactory lobes are touched by that sensuous custard smell, when the tongue tastes ‘poodi’, ‘papad’ and salad and that luscious ‘paneer’, your mind comes to a halt as the tongue takes over. In a foray of such events, i.e. after gulping down 20 ‘poodis’, stuffing myself with 3 plates of ‘paneer’ and ‘pudding’ and emptying 2 bowls of rice, my digestive system gave in.

With our ‘Da Vinci’ designed toilets, I had to be brave to run to and fro. After a few attempts my valour deserted me and with a feeling to poop every now and then, unable to gather courage, writing was the only way to stay calm. Thus, I chose to write about the meandering flow of my life at college, for some flows can’t be controlled by Stoke’s law. :P

P.S : The full title is 'Of Black holes and Ass-holes" :P